#63 session

This session was alright.  It was pretty similar to yesterday.  I am very significantly noticing that I'm getting very close to having both inputs streams accommodated while fusing.  I have made a few modifications to what I have been doing with the light tube.  As I said before, I am now doing three sessions a day while searching for jobs.  That seems to have made a significant difference in the rate of apparent progress.

Another thing I just started doing is setting the timer for 20 minutes.  Then after that 20 minutes, I continue looking into the tube for an arbitrary extra number of minutes.  This is because now I'm at the point where I get the sense that even after the 20 minutes, there's still more work to do, and there's benefit to keep going for a while extra.  This is because when I do a bit of fudging, I can notice almost immediately afterward that the brain can then engage the lazy eye more, and as a result I notice the hypertopia more.  So after the 20 minutes go by, if I'm aggressively resisting the hypertropia, I'm not going to just stop.  I like to end my sessions so that the hypertropia is relatively under control.  Plus, it's my perception that the days that I aggressively resist hypertropia, it means less permanent hypertropia from that moment on.  So I've been doing about 25-ish minutes three times a day lately.  For me at least, 40 minutes of light tube per day doesn't seem to be particularly close to the point of diminishing returns.  I could probably do two hours and it would be well used time, but of course, I have other shit to do.

The other modification that I've made is that I'm no longer doing the fudging method that I started off with where I would pull the images apart by making the lazy eye transiently exotropic, then accommodate both images, maintain accommodation, and then try to pull the images together, by aligning the eyes.  That method seemed to have its purpose at the time, but now that the out-of-sync accommodation problem is significantly diminished, and now that I appear to have a pretty high degree of independent control of the accommodation for each eye, I can lay each input stream on top of one another, and try to straight up force accommodation.  I can't do it, but I can get close, and I can tell that it's a very beneficial exercise, and it's sort of a higher intensity and a higher load version of the previous fudging method that I started doing.  It seems to be extremely effective.  I haven't stopped with the previous versions of the fudging technique--I sort of use my intuition to jostle things around, and do what makes sense at any given moment.

Again, I am anxious.  I'm also just anxious of what computer text is going to look like when my brain has no preference for which eye I (aye-aye) use.  It's interesting because even right now, I can tell quite a massive difference between the flat screen I'm looking at and my fingers and keyboard and Mountain Dew Can in front of me.  It's a slightly disorienting feeling seeing the different ways of seeing.

Saccades went well.  There is still lag when I saccade to the bottom right