Progress has slowed down a bit

I think I realized something.

I am graduating prism levels too quickly.  I will make very good apparent progress with the prisms, and that will cause me to use less.  I think I need to stop doing that, and keep using the prism even when I think I don't.

Because what seems to be happening is that I make good progress, and then I use far less prism (or none), and then I don't want to say that I go backwards exactly, but it becomes apparent later that I'm not ready for it.  The prisms definitely do free up energy to work on other tasks, like fusion.  It's far easier and less energy expensive to get the accommodation in sync, while fusing, if I'm using the prisms--even if I don't think I need it.   I've made this realization in the past, but I needed re-realize it.

Getting more depth and notice energy effects

Well, I'm still writing in this thing and I'm still noticing changes in my vision.

Today I used a bit of four diopter prism, no prism, and two diopter prism.  I noticed as I was doing the exercise that I'm still actively processing and learning how to do the exercise--partly because my relationship to the exercise continues to change.  As I get to the next level, I realize that there's a different way of doing it.

I'm definitely noticing energetic effects in particular as of late.  I get way better performance when I'm properly rested.

I actually noticed that I'm doing better at Vivid Vision games, and the depth is getting better and stronger in some of the games.  I'm really noticing the changes.  I'm inching along.  As long as I make progress, I'm happy.  Plus, I really can't stop now.  I get the sense that vision therapy is a binary outcome endeavor.  You should either go all the way with vision therapy or not do it at all.  If I stop now, then I'll have this really distracting diplopia forever--or until suppression gets rid of it.  It's imperative that I have this other eye under full control.

Very substantive prism progress

Things are still moving forward.

There hasn't been much change in the regimen.  Still doing 12 minutes of fixation cards, eight minutes of modified Brock String, 20 minutes of Vivid Vision.

Things appear to be getting more vivid in Vivid Vision.  The fixation cards--I did it yesterday with no prism at all.  My level might be two diopters, but I seem to be able to do fine with zero prism.  So the eyes must be straightening out in order for this to be true.

I do still see some misalignment in the eyes, but it really depends on the time of the day as well as energy levels.  Sometimes the eyes look really good, particularly when I'm well rested.

Crazy week

It's been a crazy week.  Crazy, but good.

It's been a week where I was noticing improvements almost every day through the week.

For one thing, I noticed that I stopped using my glasses when using my computer at work.   I just felt like they were unnecessary, and I could actually see better without them.

I've also noticed that around afternoon, my vision feels quite a bit more 'on'--like I'm using both eyes more and more.  At times I get a sense of some rivalry because teaming isn't yet perfect, and yet, suppression has gone down quite a lot.  I noticed that around Tuesday I think, as I'm looking around the office.  Then as the days went by, I noticed that I was getting into this state earlier and earlier into the day.  Changes are definitely occurring.  It's hard to know for sure whether they're positive, but I think they are.

A few weeks ago I noticed that was I looked at my security alarm panel on the wall in the distance, and then block the left eye's view of the security alarm with  my thumb, I notice that I see the thumb and the security alarm superimposed on each other.  In other words, they're blending with each other.  It's like both the security alarm and my thumb are translucent.

I'm doing the fixation cards with prisms, modified Brock String, and Vivid Vision.  Sometimes I use four diopter prism with the fixation cards, sometimes it's seven, depending on the day, and depending on how much sleep I go.

I don't know.  It really feels like things are happening now.  It's pretty damn exciting, and a bit nerve-wracking.  How much longer do I have?  Can't say.  I don't know.  I'm just riding this wave.

Reaping the rewards of focusing on fusion

Not much to say here.  I've seen quite a lot of improvement in the past month or so.  Way more improvement than what was seen from when I initially started using prisms with the fixation exercises way back in October (I think?).  Indeed, changing my focus to fusion was the right approach.

Focusing on fusion appears to be what is needed to ameliorate the accommodation out-of-sync issue.  Apparently practicing fusion with exercises causes my brain to want to practice fusion in real life for the most time, and so the real healing of the accommodation reflex occurs outside of exercise.  

Not sure how much time is left, but the changes that I'm seeing are real.  The changes with the double vision on the Brock String exercise is incredible.  They are so much closer to each other than they ever have been.  And the amount of prism that I can use and still comfortably practice fusion with the fixation cards is down to two--not like before, because I was forcing accommodation, but I'm genuinely on a two now.  

I'm also getting the impression that the Vivid Vision is starting to work on me.  I suppose I think that you need a certain amont of alignment for it to work.  Not sure whether that's true, but it jives with my knowledge for now.  I'm sanguine and looking forward to the changes that I anticipate in the coming weeks.

I have simplified my regimen a bit.  I removed the Columns workout and the acrylic accommodation sheet with concentric circles.  I think the fixation cards with the prisms are doing the heavy lifting these days. 

Focusing on fusion appears to be the right thing

I spent the past few days focusing on fusion--primarily with a four diopter prism.

I am tending to the accommodation problem in the background, but mainly focusing on fusion.

That seems to have had very significant payback in a very short amount of time.  It's incredible.  I just noticed that when doing the Brock String--the double images were closer to one another than ever before.  It was quite striking.

I was thinking about it last night, and sort of had a cognitive shift, and the thought occurred to me 'of course this is what I should be doing!'.  Getting the lazy eye accustomed to work, and actively pointing at things.  It is a high-level behavior, which possibly has downstream effects concerning the accommodation issues I've had.  That's what my experience has been.

It seems vision therapy is a combination about tending to the micro as well as the macro.  Micro: getting each eye to work on its own.  Focusing on individual accommodation.  Macro: focusing on the activity of fusion, which encompasses all subskills.

You have to develop the subskills to a passable standard.  But at some point, you have to really work on fusion.  And then the fusion macro skill will bouy the other subskills, and cause them to self-sharpen.  I've spent the past two or three months uselessly sharpening the subskills to death, seeing marginal improvements, when I really should have been putting the emphasis on fusion.  I'm going to do that for a month and see what that does.  Not going to mess around with trying to decrease prism power.  Only going to focus on fusion, and see where that takes me.

Focus on fusion

I think I started removing prism diopters too quickly.

I notice that when I'm at the right level of prism adjustment, the exercise with the fixation cards is a very different thing from what it is when I don't have enough.  I get really close to fusion.  And fusion/not fusion is a binary thing.  You're either fusing or not.  So there is a chasm of a difference there.

When there's not enough prism, I have to focus a lot on accommodation, which really defeats the point.  I suspect that I might have wasted a few months of vision therapy because I jumped the gun with the prism reduction.

I think I'm going to go back to the four diopter prism and really practice fusion, and I'm not going to move forward until I can still get fusion comfortably with a lower diopter prism.