It's the end of the weekend. I just did a 40 minute session of Diplopia with tDCS. I noticed quite a difference from the last time I played (three days ago). It started me off with Bricks. Immediately I noticed that things are bigger and seem closer to me. I still failed the initial visual integration tests that begin before you're immersed into the game. But I did do better than ever.
What else, my driving has improved quite a bit. I am much more aware of what's going on around me. This must be a result of decreased suppression. Driving is actually kind of enjoyable when your eyes work properly. I did notice, yesterday in particular, that my lazy eye seems to be doing extra work in terms of mobility--like my brain is whipping it into shape by saying 'hey, we're using you now, so start behaving like an eye.' Laziness will not be tolerated!
I do have some anxiety as my suppression continues to decrease. Are all of the pieces going to work themselves out? Or am I going to break my vision? haha! Pretty nerve wracking. This is a sentiment that I know is shared by Robert (mentioned in previous entries). He's worried, in particular, about reading. Are the words going to match up and properly overlay on top of one another so that he has a true singular view of the page? Or is it going to be a confusing non-aligning mess in which he's unable to make sense out of anything? Man. It takes a lot of balls to do vision therapy.
Sunday, November 9, 2014
Saturday, November 1, 2014
I think combining tDCS and Diplopia (game) is working
I did get a warning from a friend who linked me to a Sovoto post where someone mentioned that the game Diplopia had given him--well--diplopia. No doubt, I do have diplopia, and have always had diplopia. It just got stronger when I started doing vision therapy.
The diplopia has indeed gotten stronger since I've been playing Diplopia, and much stronger when I started incorporating tDCS in the Diplopia routine. But I'm not worried about it because the diplopia means that my brain is ignoring my left eye less and less. As long as that happens alongside improved mobility and coordination of that eye, then we're good. And that does seem to be what's happening.
Some of the metrics that I use for measuring alignment are definitely showing indications of progress. For instance, taking pictures of my eyes while tilting my head down while looking up at the mirror shows significantly less hypertropia than before. Also when I looked down at my left foot for the double left foot, the double images are almost single. Also, driving has improved quite a bit--just my confidence in changing lanes and knowing what's there.
Also, I'm really kicking ass at the Bricks game. But there's still quite a bit improvement to be had. What seems to work best for me is two days on (with tDCS), two days off. I really wanted to do Diplopia yesterday but I made myself not do it because I knew that I would benefit from the rest. And indeed the next morning my vision looked great. Vision therapy is sort of like weight training. You don't get stronger while you're working out. You get stronger during the time off. Well, break time is off for now. I've got two more days of intense training.
Saturday, October 25, 2014
So I tried playing Diplopia while undergoing transcranial direct current stimulation...
... with positive results. It was inevitable for me to try this.
The Bricks game is generally very difficult for me. But this time I did extremely well.
It's hard to say whether I'm getting better at the game because I'm learning how to interpret what I'm seeing in the game, or whether it's because my vision is improving. Likely, it's both. Usually with Bricks, I'm pretty bad, especially when the ball comes at me on the left side (my suppressing side) and in the mid-left side. My judgement really stinks in that area. But this time I did extraordinarily well. I have never got past the second level. This time, I got past the fourth level. My judgement just seemed to be very good. Is it because of improved vision? I don't know.
Putting on the electrodes was a pain in the ass (like always), but particularly so because I have to situate them around the HMD. I guess what gave me the idea to try Diplopia with tDCS is because tDCS is known to help with fatigue. One of the things that I've learned in my vision therapy journey is to take breaks, especially if you have high-intensity workouts. A friend had visited for a few days and during those days I did not play Diplopia. Those days I saw visual improvement. So I think I'm going to do a two day off, two day on schedule. However, this is the third day, but I figured that I could get through it if I combine it with tDCS since it's known to help with fatigue. But since I can do it with tDCS, I may as well do Diplopia with tDCS since tDCS is also known to help with vision therapy exercises that focus on breaking through suppression.
The Diplopia workouts are definitely good even without tDCS, so I may mix and match sessions with and without, but if I had to guess, they do combine quite nicely. I'll be doing this in future sessions for sure.
The Bricks game is generally very difficult for me. But this time I did extremely well.
It's hard to say whether I'm getting better at the game because I'm learning how to interpret what I'm seeing in the game, or whether it's because my vision is improving. Likely, it's both. Usually with Bricks, I'm pretty bad, especially when the ball comes at me on the left side (my suppressing side) and in the mid-left side. My judgement really stinks in that area. But this time I did extraordinarily well. I have never got past the second level. This time, I got past the fourth level. My judgement just seemed to be very good. Is it because of improved vision? I don't know.
Putting on the electrodes was a pain in the ass (like always), but particularly so because I have to situate them around the HMD. I guess what gave me the idea to try Diplopia with tDCS is because tDCS is known to help with fatigue. One of the things that I've learned in my vision therapy journey is to take breaks, especially if you have high-intensity workouts. A friend had visited for a few days and during those days I did not play Diplopia. Those days I saw visual improvement. So I think I'm going to do a two day off, two day on schedule. However, this is the third day, but I figured that I could get through it if I combine it with tDCS since it's known to help with fatigue. But since I can do it with tDCS, I may as well do Diplopia with tDCS since tDCS is also known to help with vision therapy exercises that focus on breaking through suppression.
The Diplopia workouts are definitely good even without tDCS, so I may mix and match sessions with and without, but if I had to guess, they do combine quite nicely. I'll be doing this in future sessions for sure.
Sunday, October 19, 2014
An update on progress with Diplopia
I mentioned in previous entries that I stopped doing ordinary vision therapy after I got my Oculus Rift. Now all of my vision therapy is done via the Oculus Rift through the game Diplopia. I've been playing Diplopia for almost two weeks. Here's where I currently am with it.
I am making progress with Diplopia, although it's not as fast as the progress which others have reported. One of the test subjects, Dillon, reported seeing depth immediately after putting on the HMD and playing the game for a bit. James said that it took around five sessions for the game to correct his vision and to get flashes of stereopsis. Diplopia seems to work very quickly in general, but not as fast for me, probably because my brain sucks. :/
That said, I am making quick progress. It's hard to explain exactly how I'm making progress, just that I am. I suppose you could say that my double vision input streams are converging on one another. Also, when I look at something close up, I'm very aware of the two input streams. So the suppression has come down. With decreased suppression comes more overt diplopia, although it's not very bothersome for some reason, probably because the input streams are converging pretty well.
Playing the games is still tricky. I'm kicking ass at Space. I've figured out that game pretty well, and I'm able to fly the spacecraft through the rings with good facility. It's enjoyable. Sometimes I lose track of the spacecraft because I can only see it with my left eye. I can tell that the game is really working my vision.
The other game, Breaker, I'm getting better at. It's still tricky, however, especially when I have to whack the ball in certain areas. Around midfield on the right side I almost always whiff. My depth perception still sucks in the game Breaker, while it seems to be pretty good at Space.
Anyway, it's still early. It's only been a bit more than a week. We'll see where it takes me in a month.
Tuesday, October 7, 2014
The Diplopia beta has been released to those who opted in (FINALLY!!!)
So I got Diplopia beta. I played it for around 40 minutes yesterday. You can consider this an informal review of the game so far.
The first impression that I have of the game after starting the executable is that it is very smooth and apparently polished. There's also no anti-aliasing so some of the edges are pixelated.
It does a number of vision tests for suppression and visual integration, and then you get launched into the game.
The two games I've seen thus far is a Breakout-type game, and another game where you're flying through space blasting asteroids with a spacecraft. The first game that I started (I didn't select to play the game, it just chose for me) was the spacecraft game. The game starts with a timer set for 20 minutes (your vision therapy session length). Your goal is to get as many points as possible by picking up items that you see. You have to figure out where they are by gauging depth and space.
After playing for about five minutes, I could tell that the game was definitely doing something to my vision. I could tell that the game was trying to force me to see in stereo. It felt like I might have made the sudden shift at any moment, although it didn't happen. It was definitely a strange sensation. It was almost like I had approached a portal through which a different world resided, and I was so close to passing through. That's the best way that I can explain it.
It's a fairly stimulating game--both the spacecraft game and the Breakout game. You can tell how it works. It forces both of your eyes to work in order to play the game by making certain elements only visible to each eye. So with the Breakout game, you have your paddle which you can only see with your left eye, and the ball, which you can see only with the right eye. In order to play and be successful at the game you must use both eyes. Because of my suppression, this game is difficult. I sort of have to guess as to where the paddle is in relationship to where the ball is. But it's very satisfying when I can whack it because it gives me instant feedback as to where things are in 3d.
It's a brilliant game. It solves so many problems at once. For one, because the Oculus Rift has a giant field of view that means that the game can exercise the peripheral vision. Another thing is that stereoscopic effects aren't produced by an active shutter mechanism, so the composite image is very bright and high quality. The Oculus Rift DK2 also has positional and orientation tracking so that the vestibular system is engaged with the game (Diplopia has made good, smooth use of the DK2's positional tracking). Finally, the games are very engaging and stimulating. They're not boring. The 20 minute sessions go by pretty quickly. It's challenging. You are really paying attention and engaging your brain in order to reach the target goals. This is what vision therapy should be!
After I did the initial 20 minute session I tried to go back to the spacecraft game that I was playing before, but couldn't. There's no choice to select the game that you play. Instead, it took me to the Breakout game, which I played around with for quite a while. One thing I noticed is that you have to be logged in before you play the game. I wonder if the guys at Diplopia are tracking you to make sure that you play the spacecraft game for only 20 minutes per day. You can't play the game if you don't have an active Internet connection. We'll find out.
For a while I was tempted to make vision therapy games (since I have an Oculus Rift developer kit), but it's hard to see how this can be improved upon. But maybe that's just a copout. Major props to James for creating such a powerful use case for VR HMDs. It's amazingly well put together for a beta. I'm going to try and contain my excitement and just see how things go for the next week. Thank you, James!!
dipolopiagame.com
The first impression that I have of the game after starting the executable is that it is very smooth and apparently polished. There's also no anti-aliasing so some of the edges are pixelated.
It does a number of vision tests for suppression and visual integration, and then you get launched into the game.
The two games I've seen thus far is a Breakout-type game, and another game where you're flying through space blasting asteroids with a spacecraft. The first game that I started (I didn't select to play the game, it just chose for me) was the spacecraft game. The game starts with a timer set for 20 minutes (your vision therapy session length). Your goal is to get as many points as possible by picking up items that you see. You have to figure out where they are by gauging depth and space.
After playing for about five minutes, I could tell that the game was definitely doing something to my vision. I could tell that the game was trying to force me to see in stereo. It felt like I might have made the sudden shift at any moment, although it didn't happen. It was definitely a strange sensation. It was almost like I had approached a portal through which a different world resided, and I was so close to passing through. That's the best way that I can explain it.
It's a fairly stimulating game--both the spacecraft game and the Breakout game. You can tell how it works. It forces both of your eyes to work in order to play the game by making certain elements only visible to each eye. So with the Breakout game, you have your paddle which you can only see with your left eye, and the ball, which you can see only with the right eye. In order to play and be successful at the game you must use both eyes. Because of my suppression, this game is difficult. I sort of have to guess as to where the paddle is in relationship to where the ball is. But it's very satisfying when I can whack it because it gives me instant feedback as to where things are in 3d.
It's a brilliant game. It solves so many problems at once. For one, because the Oculus Rift has a giant field of view that means that the game can exercise the peripheral vision. Another thing is that stereoscopic effects aren't produced by an active shutter mechanism, so the composite image is very bright and high quality. The Oculus Rift DK2 also has positional and orientation tracking so that the vestibular system is engaged with the game (Diplopia has made good, smooth use of the DK2's positional tracking). Finally, the games are very engaging and stimulating. They're not boring. The 20 minute sessions go by pretty quickly. It's challenging. You are really paying attention and engaging your brain in order to reach the target goals. This is what vision therapy should be!
After I did the initial 20 minute session I tried to go back to the spacecraft game that I was playing before, but couldn't. There's no choice to select the game that you play. Instead, it took me to the Breakout game, which I played around with for quite a while. One thing I noticed is that you have to be logged in before you play the game. I wonder if the guys at Diplopia are tracking you to make sure that you play the spacecraft game for only 20 minutes per day. You can't play the game if you don't have an active Internet connection. We'll find out.
For a while I was tempted to make vision therapy games (since I have an Oculus Rift developer kit), but it's hard to see how this can be improved upon. But maybe that's just a copout. Major props to James for creating such a powerful use case for VR HMDs. It's amazingly well put together for a beta. I'm going to try and contain my excitement and just see how things go for the next week. Thank you, James!!
dipolopiagame.com
Wednesday, September 24, 2014
An interesting way to read
I learned about a tip for increasing reading speed while reading Tim Ferriss's 4-Hour Work Week. Try to limit yourself to two saccades per line. The way you do this is by training your peripheral vision. So for instance, you start each line by looking at the third word and using your peripheral vision to see the beginning. Then end each line by looking at the third to the last word and finishing the line with the peripheral vision.
This is very tough to do if you have strabismus, and thus, are suppressing. Reading in general is tougher if you have strabismus. But in the week or so that I've been training myself to do this, I've changed the way that I read quite a bit. At first it was incredibly difficult and distracting, because I normally read with my right eye. However, now I alternate. When I begin a line, I start with my left eye. Then as I make my way to the end, I go to the right eye.
By doing this, I noticed that my right eye is quite a bit stronger than my left eye. Starting the line is harder than ending it because starting it requires using the peripheral vision of my left eye, which I guess is my lazy eye. Honestly, it's pretty exhausting. But I think it's actually quite beneficial to try and expand the vision in the eye in this sort of way because it's forcing that eye to be stronger and command more resources from my brain. It has increased the power of my VR experiences quite a bit. I have been tired, sleeping a lot, and a bit edgy. These are things that usually come with fruitful changes in the brain in my experience.
I haven't done actual vision therapy in at least a month or so for now. I've been doing mainly VR games. I've been anxiously awaiting for James Blaha's Diplopia to come out. I keep hearing that it's coming soon. James actually spoke in the Enter VR podcast a week ago. It was an excellent interview. It blew my mind listening to such a great mind talk. One of the interesting things he said that stuck with me was that he said his goals aren't per se about fixing strabismus, but improving people's perception(s). I highly recommend giving it a listen.
That's it for now.
This is very tough to do if you have strabismus, and thus, are suppressing. Reading in general is tougher if you have strabismus. But in the week or so that I've been training myself to do this, I've changed the way that I read quite a bit. At first it was incredibly difficult and distracting, because I normally read with my right eye. However, now I alternate. When I begin a line, I start with my left eye. Then as I make my way to the end, I go to the right eye.
By doing this, I noticed that my right eye is quite a bit stronger than my left eye. Starting the line is harder than ending it because starting it requires using the peripheral vision of my left eye, which I guess is my lazy eye. Honestly, it's pretty exhausting. But I think it's actually quite beneficial to try and expand the vision in the eye in this sort of way because it's forcing that eye to be stronger and command more resources from my brain. It has increased the power of my VR experiences quite a bit. I have been tired, sleeping a lot, and a bit edgy. These are things that usually come with fruitful changes in the brain in my experience.
I haven't done actual vision therapy in at least a month or so for now. I've been doing mainly VR games. I've been anxiously awaiting for James Blaha's Diplopia to come out. I keep hearing that it's coming soon. James actually spoke in the Enter VR podcast a week ago. It was an excellent interview. It blew my mind listening to such a great mind talk. One of the interesting things he said that stuck with me was that he said his goals aren't per se about fixing strabismus, but improving people's perception(s). I highly recommend giving it a listen.
That's it for now.
Saturday, September 20, 2014
Random thoughts on clinical depression and strabismus
There's going to be a lot of ignorant and wild speculation in this episode so brace yourself.
A link between clinical depression and strabismus is a topic which repeatedly comes up in conversations among people in our DIY Vision Therapy group. It does seem that there are higher than average levels of clinical depression in those with strabismus based on my ignorant and wild guessing.
My understanding of what depression is, for a lot of people, is the result of the mind running amuck. Everyone has an internal dialog, but for depressed people, their internal dialog is particularly repetitive, active, and impulsive. The parts of our brain which do thinking are connected to the parts of our brain which do emoting, so every time we have a thought we have an associated emotion. So if you have constant, repetitive thoughts that are negative, the result can be chronic negative emotions which can become clinical depression (as opposed to transient depression).
This link between the thinking and emoting parts of the brain is what cognitive behavioral therapy is based on. The purpose of CBT is to break the constant cycle of negative thinking and the related negative emotions, and thus, stop depression. This is also what many PTSD treatments are based on. People who have PTSD symptoms suffer not simply because they suffered a traumatic event. They suffer because they're repeatedly experiencing the same traumatic event again and again in their minds. When you revisit old traumatic memories, the brain and body don't realize that what they're experiencing isn't real. So you really are reliving the experiences again and again, and your body is paying the toll of constantly activating the sympathetic nervous system and the cascading stress effects.
This cycle causes brain damage, substance addiction as a result of people trying to manage the pain, and mental collapse. It's no doubt largely responsible for familiar picture that Americans have of homeless vets. There are new treatments which use LSD and MDMA, which are supposedly very effective for PTSD. The purpose is to allow the patients to experience the traumatic memories without the associated negative emotions, and thus, stop the pain and constant grating on the body's fight or flight systems.
A little while ago I was listening to a fascinating conversation between Sam Harris and Joe Rogan on Joe's podcast about the topic of mindfulness. Sam was talking about the irony about how most people have an internal dialog, which, if it was uttered aloud, they would appear to be completely insane to any observer. The only difference between a 'normal' person and an overtly mentally ill homeless man talking to himself is he's making his internal dialog available to everyone around him. Most of our internal dialog is a repetitive, futile waste of brain cycles--and not to mention, harmful to the end user. Sam asked the question 'Why is it that we consider this normal?' Indeed.
This is sort of interesting to me, because it's only recently that I've started to get serious about meditation (the past four months). I'd read about all of the benefits from recent brain studies, like increased brain mass, improved learning, and focus. Since I was hearing so much about it from legitimate sources, I thought I'd give it a try. I'd done it a bit in the past, but stopped for whatever reasons, so I already had some idea of what I was doing. In revisited experience, 10-15 minutes of meditation--even somewhat crappy meditation--since I'm still bad at it, is extremely beneficial to my mood, and focus during the day.
The main things that I've noticed is that I'm much calmer, and seem to have an almost unlimited focus. My drifting is very not much. It's resulted in me doing a lot of cleaning and organizing. One of the interesting things I've noticed since I've started doing meditation again is that every once in a while I'll get a nice high, whether while doing meditation, or while doing nothing, or waiting. Yesterday I was at the gym doing squats, waiting between sets, not doing anything. I was relatively mentally silent. All of a sudden, everything seemed to go quiet. I was suddenly aware of my body, the music playing in the gym, and all of the other bodies moving around, doing reps and moving their legs in circular motions. It felt like a real high, and a lot of happiness of being right there, right then.
My morning routine is 15 minutes of meditation before I go out of the door. One of the things I've noticed is that I can know very accurately how well my day is going to go depending on how well I do with meditation. I occasionally meditate very crappily and my day will consequently suck. Other days I know that I did very well, and the day will be excellent as a result--regardless of what happens. It seems to be a very good predictor. If meditation goes well, I can't have a bad day. I still do drift, and I still do have some insane inner dialogs, but I'm aware of it and I think to myself 'Oh, Andy, you know better than that.' I suppose that's the whole point of mindfulness.
You might be wondering what this has to do with strabismus. Here's where I'm going with this. If there is a link between strabismus and clinical depression, maybe it's because visual processing takes up a lot of brain power. After all, the visual cortex is a giant part of the brain. People who are using only half of the available visual input via suppression thus have more brain cycles which can be used for other things--like dysfunctional thought. For people who have normal stereoscopic vision, there are fewer spare brain cycles available for repetitive thought, and thus neurodysfunction.
It does seem to me that people who have normal vision are more 'there'. They're more engaged and part of what is going on around them. Therefore, they're going to have less going on internally, and fewer repetitive, dysfunctional thoughts.
When I'm having a conversation with someone, it's not uncommon for me to look at him in the eyes and wonder about what he is seeing, and what his experience of consciousness is like. People on, average, do seem to be very much 'there' and in the moment. Like, when people watch sports, their eyes are very intensely trained on what they're seeing, and it seems like the whole system is working in synergy to recreate what they're seeing and participate in the event.
One thing that comes to mind is something Heather said. She's someone who had strabismus, but recovered full stereoscopic vision through vision therapy. She said 'I feel that the world is more real.' It sort of goes hand in hand with something Susan Barry said, something like 'I feel like I am now in the world.'--like more of a participant. They say that seeing in stereo is a fundamentally different experience.
People like Heather are important to me because she's one of the very few people who understand what it's like to live in both worlds. There is a Reddit AMA that linked to in previous entries that I'll repost here. It's some guy who recovered stereopsis via surgery. He said
A link between clinical depression and strabismus is a topic which repeatedly comes up in conversations among people in our DIY Vision Therapy group. It does seem that there are higher than average levels of clinical depression in those with strabismus based on my ignorant and wild guessing.
My understanding of what depression is, for a lot of people, is the result of the mind running amuck. Everyone has an internal dialog, but for depressed people, their internal dialog is particularly repetitive, active, and impulsive. The parts of our brain which do thinking are connected to the parts of our brain which do emoting, so every time we have a thought we have an associated emotion. So if you have constant, repetitive thoughts that are negative, the result can be chronic negative emotions which can become clinical depression (as opposed to transient depression).
This link between the thinking and emoting parts of the brain is what cognitive behavioral therapy is based on. The purpose of CBT is to break the constant cycle of negative thinking and the related negative emotions, and thus, stop depression. This is also what many PTSD treatments are based on. People who have PTSD symptoms suffer not simply because they suffered a traumatic event. They suffer because they're repeatedly experiencing the same traumatic event again and again in their minds. When you revisit old traumatic memories, the brain and body don't realize that what they're experiencing isn't real. So you really are reliving the experiences again and again, and your body is paying the toll of constantly activating the sympathetic nervous system and the cascading stress effects.
This cycle causes brain damage, substance addiction as a result of people trying to manage the pain, and mental collapse. It's no doubt largely responsible for familiar picture that Americans have of homeless vets. There are new treatments which use LSD and MDMA, which are supposedly very effective for PTSD. The purpose is to allow the patients to experience the traumatic memories without the associated negative emotions, and thus, stop the pain and constant grating on the body's fight or flight systems.
A little while ago I was listening to a fascinating conversation between Sam Harris and Joe Rogan on Joe's podcast about the topic of mindfulness. Sam was talking about the irony about how most people have an internal dialog, which, if it was uttered aloud, they would appear to be completely insane to any observer. The only difference between a 'normal' person and an overtly mentally ill homeless man talking to himself is he's making his internal dialog available to everyone around him. Most of our internal dialog is a repetitive, futile waste of brain cycles--and not to mention, harmful to the end user. Sam asked the question 'Why is it that we consider this normal?' Indeed.
This is sort of interesting to me, because it's only recently that I've started to get serious about meditation (the past four months). I'd read about all of the benefits from recent brain studies, like increased brain mass, improved learning, and focus. Since I was hearing so much about it from legitimate sources, I thought I'd give it a try. I'd done it a bit in the past, but stopped for whatever reasons, so I already had some idea of what I was doing. In revisited experience, 10-15 minutes of meditation--even somewhat crappy meditation--since I'm still bad at it, is extremely beneficial to my mood, and focus during the day.
The main things that I've noticed is that I'm much calmer, and seem to have an almost unlimited focus. My drifting is very not much. It's resulted in me doing a lot of cleaning and organizing. One of the interesting things I've noticed since I've started doing meditation again is that every once in a while I'll get a nice high, whether while doing meditation, or while doing nothing, or waiting. Yesterday I was at the gym doing squats, waiting between sets, not doing anything. I was relatively mentally silent. All of a sudden, everything seemed to go quiet. I was suddenly aware of my body, the music playing in the gym, and all of the other bodies moving around, doing reps and moving their legs in circular motions. It felt like a real high, and a lot of happiness of being right there, right then.
My morning routine is 15 minutes of meditation before I go out of the door. One of the things I've noticed is that I can know very accurately how well my day is going to go depending on how well I do with meditation. I occasionally meditate very crappily and my day will consequently suck. Other days I know that I did very well, and the day will be excellent as a result--regardless of what happens. It seems to be a very good predictor. If meditation goes well, I can't have a bad day. I still do drift, and I still do have some insane inner dialogs, but I'm aware of it and I think to myself 'Oh, Andy, you know better than that.' I suppose that's the whole point of mindfulness.
You might be wondering what this has to do with strabismus. Here's where I'm going with this. If there is a link between strabismus and clinical depression, maybe it's because visual processing takes up a lot of brain power. After all, the visual cortex is a giant part of the brain. People who are using only half of the available visual input via suppression thus have more brain cycles which can be used for other things--like dysfunctional thought. For people who have normal stereoscopic vision, there are fewer spare brain cycles available for repetitive thought, and thus neurodysfunction.
It does seem to me that people who have normal vision are more 'there'. They're more engaged and part of what is going on around them. Therefore, they're going to have less going on internally, and fewer repetitive, dysfunctional thoughts.
When I'm having a conversation with someone, it's not uncommon for me to look at him in the eyes and wonder about what he is seeing, and what his experience of consciousness is like. People on, average, do seem to be very much 'there' and in the moment. Like, when people watch sports, their eyes are very intensely trained on what they're seeing, and it seems like the whole system is working in synergy to recreate what they're seeing and participate in the event.
One thing that comes to mind is something Heather said. She's someone who had strabismus, but recovered full stereoscopic vision through vision therapy. She said 'I feel that the world is more real.' It sort of goes hand in hand with something Susan Barry said, something like 'I feel like I am now in the world.'--like more of a participant. They say that seeing in stereo is a fundamentally different experience.
People like Heather are important to me because she's one of the very few people who understand what it's like to live in both worlds. There is a Reddit AMA that linked to in previous entries that I'll repost here. It's some guy who recovered stereopsis via surgery. He said
He's completely stunned by the visual phenomena, and just seeing people walk around in a crowded room, still adjusting to all of the visual information. Maybe it would be harder to be taken away by dysfunctional thoughts when you're so occupied by what's so violently grabbing your visual attention.
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